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Marriage Illustrated with Crappy Pictures

Fine Lines

$ 16.95

Actually, that’s just the cover. There are 176 pages included in the real thing.

This is what it says on the back cover:

MARRIAGE: ILLUSTRATED WITH CRAPPY PICTURES provides much-needed laughs about coping with another person’s hygiene habits, cleaning rituals (including their ritual of not cleaning), financial decisions, cooking quirks and everything else that makes your spouse weird and annoying special and perfect in every way.

So what is inside? Stories and illustrations that you have NEVER SEEN. Funny stuff, annoying stuff, gross stuff, infuriating stuff and embarrassing stuff. And good stuff too.

99.9% of the content is brand new. I wish I could say it is 100% new but there is one story that was once published on this blog. I just had to include it. You’ll get an imaginary gold star if you read the book and remember it. That means you are one of the long time readers, yay! (I removed it from the blog many moons ago.)

Three interesting facts that I should mention about this book:

  1. I’m wearing a red dress in this book most of the time. (There is a parenting chapter and the purple dress is worn then though.) So. This means I once owned a red dress before I had kids. Now you know.
  2. I call my husband Crappy Husband in this book rather than Crappy Papa. This is because some of the stories are from before we had kids. Calling him Crappy Papa back then would have been weird.
  3. This book is not for kids. It’s about marriage. I thought the title made that clear enough, but I’m just gonna go ahead and reiterate it. If you let your kid read this book because it has cute pictures and they wind up asking you about monkey sex, that is not my responsibility. Sorry, you are on your own. Good luck

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